Yes, this really happened.
I was 10 years old and clueless about everything – except maybe Pokémon. Oh, and Goldeneye for Nintendo 64. I was a savage at Goldeneye. I could literally beat it with my eyes closed (pause). With no cheat codes either (if you know, you know).
Anyways, back to the story.
This was in 2001 – the days when kid birthday parties reigned supreme.
Entire classes would be invited. We’d eat pizza, drink soda, and run around with minimal supervision. I’m getting excited just thinking about it…
That year for one my friends birthday parties, we went to see The Mummy Returns in theaters.
I remember being psyched about it. Going to the movies was one of my all time favorite things to do – it still is. Right behind Chipotle and touring Gettysburg (I’m such a nerd, I know).
Anyways, I hadn’t heard of The Mummy Returns but was excited nonetheless. I knew it had something to do with mummies – and mummies are badass (obviously).
So on the day of the party we all met at the birthday boy’s house. There had to of been at least 30 of us there. We somehow packed into two vans and hit the road.
I remember everyone in the van raving about the awesome new movie theatre we were going to. I hadn’t heard of it so I got even more excited.
When we pulled up, I almost shit my pants.
The movie theater was named Muvico Egyptian. It looked as if it belonged in ancient Egypt. The entrance was lined with Shaquille O’Neal sized Pharaohs and Anubis statues.
I was in total awe.
How had I not heard of The Mummy Returns?
The movie was so big that they freakin built a whole movie theater for it!
Or so I thought.
I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited for anything in my life. I got a big bucket of popcorn, a soda, and sour patch kids (this is still my go-to). I was in in heaven.
We then filed into the theater, which of course looked exactly like an Egyptian Pharaoh’s tomb (swoon).
This movie was already my all time favorite, and I hadn’t even seen it yet.
It was finally show time.
I don’t think I blinked once. I was entranced. There were swords, guns, mummies, pharaohs, and even killer insects (scarabs).
Side note – I thought the killer scarabs were real for the longest time. They scared the shit out of me. I vowed never to visit Egypt because of them.
Aside from my deep fear of scarabs, I loved every minute of the movie. I wanted to watch it again the second it was over.
I remember thinking how lucky I was to have seen a movie in a theater that was exclusively built for that movie. I thought it was a once in a lifetime experience.
It was years before I found out the theater had nothing to do with the movie. Muvico was a chain of theaters and they all were Egyptian themed. I was devastated when I found out.
Around that same time I also found out that The Mummy Returns was actually a sequel. SMH. I was so embarrassed. How could I have been so dumb?
Regardless of the harsh truth, The Mummy Returns remains one of my favorite movies.
The bliss of that day lives vividly in my imagination.
A good movie seen at the perfect time in your life can transport you into a whole new world. A new fantastic point of view. No one to tell us no. Or where to go. Or say we’re only dreaming…
If you didn’t sing that in your head, we shouldn’t be friends.
The Mummy Returns didn’t win any Oscars and may have received a mere 47% on Rotten Tomatoes, BUT it was one of the best movies I’d ever seen.
Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed my little anecdote.
Movie magic is real people! Don’t let anyone tell you different.
Peace out!
P.S. Brendan Fraser is due for a major comeback. You heard it here first!
Brendan Bald 